Life These Days

It's been way too long since I've actually ever written anything on here, but for some reason, I've got the urge to start blogging again. I really like writing, but sometimes I just feel like words come more easily for me through conversation then when I try to put them together on paper. So, even though I'm not so sure I'm great at this.. I'll give it a shot.

Just as a quick update of my life, I'm still living in Provo and attending Brigham Young University. I'm studying Mathematics Education, and though sometimes I wonder why I've condemned myself, I really do look forward to having my own classroom in a short couple of years! I love learning about learning, and I can't wait to help students not only learn math, but learn to love math like they didn't know they could. This semester I'm taking some GE's and thus less math classes, and so I'm not procrastinating like I did last semester. I'm really proud of how on top of everything I've stayed. I can't believe I'm saying this, but it really does feel good to study and know that I'm getting things done - sometimes even earlier than needed. I also think that life is going a little better than it did last semester, but that's a story for later. . Anyway.

When I'm not in the Talmage building, I'm working at Build-A-Bear Workshop - the best job ever. I've been an Associate Manager for almost a year, and I've worked there for almost two. At times the job can be very demanding, but overall, I really do love my job. I love my co-workers, I love the atmosphere, but most of all, I love making people happy. There's just something about seeing a smile on a little kid's face when you hand them their new best friend. It's the most fulfilling feeling! I know I get paid.. but I honestly just love going to work and losing myself in helping others. It's seriously the best feeling and the best cure to a bad day! There have been days that I have dreaded going to work whether it be because I have so much homework, or because my day just hadn't gone too well, but when I decide to put a smile on and just make other people happy, I seriously find so much happiness myself. I love helping other people! And most of all, I love the contagiousness that smiles have! Another plus of the job is that I get to see the cutest little kids everyday! It makes me so excited for the day I have some of my own!! I seriously am so excited to be a mother! Guess I should probably find myself a man first.

And I guess you might be curious about that aspect of life as well. Well, there's not much to tell. I've got a lot of great friends, but I haven't really dated anyone in awhile. And you know, that's okay. Right now I'm really not sure where life is taking me, and what paths lie ahead, but all I know is I'm having patience - patience with the Lord, patience with time, patience with myself. I'm just at a point in my life where I could choose from many different paths. I'm 21 now, and so I could serve a mission if I'd like to, which I'm not sure about. I'd like to get married, too, but I know that it'll all happen in good time. So for now, I pray for patience knowing that no matter which path I take, I'm in God's care. I'm very much the person who's always looking ahead to the future and so sometimes I have a hard time living in the moment and living for today, but lately God's just told me to have patience and to love today. This hasn't been easy for me, but I've really started to see His hand in my everyday life and in places I had never imagined before. I know that when we slow down and remember Him, our lives will be blessed. I'm not sure where my life is taking me, but I know I'm doing the right things, and so everything will be okay.

Can I just say how amazingly empty the roads are at 4 am? My friend, Holli, came over last night and I took her home way late. I guess she pretty much spent the night when she said she wasn't going to, ha. But seriously, the roads were so empty. I felt like the only person alive - it was a neat feeling. It just got me to thinking, and then for some reason, despite the fact that it was 4 in the morning, I could not get to sleep. I've kinda been in a deep thinking mood the past few days, though, so I wasn't surprised when I couldn't get to sleep. I've just had such a great appreciation and gratitude for amazing friends. I can't tell you how many times my life has been blessed recently by the encouraging words or smile of a friend. I just hope that I've been half as good of a friend as mine have been to me. I seriously am so blessed! My roommates are the biggest blessing and bring such a spirit and sweetness into our apartment and my life! There's just something about being surrounded by such amazing people - you rise up, too! They lift me higher and make me smile everyday. I don't think I've ever been surrounded by such amazing friends.. and to think, just two years ago I moved up here with no friends at all, and now Provo has become more of a home to me than I could have ever imagined. That to me is evidence that God loves us. He is the reason I'm here. If not for Him, I'd still be at U.T., and let me tell you how grateful I am that He led me here! Best decision of my life. Hands down. I've found and am still finding amazing friends, I'm learning so much, I'm strengthening my own testimony, and I'm preparing myself for the rest of my life. Sometimes I do wish I were closer to home, I've found bits of home here in the friendships I have made.

And so, that's life these days. I do crazy math problems, I build bears, I try to make someone smile everyday, and I try to be the best I can be. I've started slowing down and learning to enjoy the amazing journey that life is. There are some days where I doubt and I struggle to carry on, but I try to have faith. I'm not sure where exactly I'll be in 3 years - but this I do know. I've got amazing friends, the best family, and a Father in Heaven who loves me more than I could ever know. What amazing reassurance!

I hope something made you smile today. If not, I'll make you smile. Just do it. You won't regret it. :)

Here's some videos for ya:
Something to give you hope.
Something to remind you that you're loved.
Something to make you laugh.
Something to keep you going.

Love and Laughter,
Tiffany.